What if?
by yourheartlivesinmyvagina
Summary: Derek and Meredith, divorced with kids but they still love eachother, who is with who now? One-shot...    k  for suicide   Merder der/apr   and yeah, i do NOT want april/derek as a couple EVER..  i want her to die.. painfully please?


**A/N: oneshot, what if Derek hooked up with April when he and Mer divorced? (which im glad NEVER would happend but still) read and rewiew. you'll love it!  
**  
Derek looked at April, her brown hair was curled easily and her red dress showed her small curves.  
"I love you April" Derek smiled at her and kissed her forehead.  
"I love you to Chief Shepherd" She smiled back at him.  
Derek opened the door on the passenger side and helped April in before he sat down in the drivers' seat and drove away from the trailer. They were driving off to Ohio to see Aprils parents and learn how to grow corn.  
"I love corn" Derek laughed as they hit the road.  
"Yeah, me to" April murmured.  
"I wish… " Derek started..  
"Wish what?"  
"That… My kids were here to, David and Sarah would love the farm.."  
"But, aren't they with… Mer?" Aprils voice suddenly started to shake.

"Why we not go with daddy?" The four year old David sat on the chair in the kitchen.  
"Cause he's with his new.. girlfriend" Mer scoffed and sighed.  
_ - - - -  
"Mer, I can't I can't do this.. " Dereks voice echoed in the empty halls.  
"But.. Derek.. what about David?" Mers eyes filled with tears.  
"I don't know.. " Derek sighed.  
"But Derek, what about.. " She cried now, tears were streaming down her face, mostly in anger.  
"what about what?" Derek started to get pissed now.  
"Our other baby.. This one" She had her hands on her stomach, which was flat, she hadn't told him.. They fought to much these days.  
"You're pregnant?" Dereks voice softened a little.  
"Yeah" Mer snapped  
"Don't snap on me"  
"I'll snap if I want to snap.. Go have sex with April, I know you want to.. You are so like Addison"  
"I am not.. I haven't slept with your best friend, I haven't even cheated on you. What the hell Mer?"  
"Blame the hormones… "  
"Come here" he took her in his arms and kissed her. "I love you, and I always will.. okay?"  
"I love you too"_

"Daddy just thought I didn't want him to be here.." She smiled at the little boy, from upstairs she heard a small cry and she ran up the stairs to find her two year old daughter sitting in her crib.  
"What's wrong baby?" Mer picked the small baby up in her arms and kissed her forehead softly.  
"Dada, hjug"  
"Daddy isn't here.. " She took the girl down the stairs and sat her in the chair.  
"David? DAVID?" She looked at the little boy who had picked up the scissors.  
"Put those down. NOW"  
_ - - - -  
_Derek looked at the road, inside his chest it ached. It ached so bad when he thought of his two kids, his ex-wife, how could he divorce her? Mer was the love of his life, he shouldn't be on his way to ohio with, April Kepner who couldn't even call him by his first name.  
"Ehm, April. Dear.. I need to go back. I have to .. "  
"Tell Meredith you love her? I figured that out" April smiled.  
She smiled, what the hell? Dereks mind spun around.  
"Yeah.. Sorry about this.. " He gave her a short smile.  
"It's okay, I'm in love with that new guy.. Lucas you know?"  
Derek looked at her as he turned the car around, and speeded to the hospital.  
As he had dropped April of he speeded to his old home and parked on the driveway.

Through the window Mer saw a car she remembered.  
"What the…?" She sighed as she picked the girl up and took David in her free hand and walked out on the porch.  
"What do you want?" She hissed and she held David close to her body.  
Derek felt on the left side of his chest, there it was. His old engagement ring, Mers old engagement ring.  
"What do you want? Are you dumb?" She scoffed as she looked at him, even though she felt hear heartbeat increase, she loved him so much and she didn't understand why she had let go of him.  
Derek looked at her and smiled to David and Sarah, before he went down on one knee. Mer lost her breath as she saw him.  
"Meredith Grey, I love you and I always will.. Do you want to marry me?" He smiled.  
Merediths eyes filled with tears, and they fell as she nodded.  
"Of course Derek Shepherd.. And just so you know, my name is Meredith Shepherd, I never changed it.. I always wanted you back"  
She put the two year old girl down before she jumped into his arms and kissed him.  
"I Love you, so much Derek"  
"I love you so much too Meredith"  
"I'll never let you go again, I just had the worst year ever.. " She started to cry.  
"I know, I know" He wiped away the tears on her cheek. "I'll never let you go again"

_ - - - -  
_Meredith had a new white dress; it barely showed her stomach which she was all alone to know about. She smiled as she walked down the aisle, and she smiled through the entire wedding that she'd waited 6 months for. Beside her Amelia, her favorite sister of the four stood with Sarah in her arms, and David holding her hand. Beside her Lexie was standing, and behind Derek his best man Mark was standing. When Meredith and Derek had walked out she bent over and whispered into his ear.  
"Derek, We're going to have another kid" And Derek turned to her.  
"Whenever you are ready my love" He whispered back and Meredith rolled his eyes.  
"Smarty-pants, I'm pregnant.. " She smiled at him and he bent over and kissed her again.  
"Meredith Shepherd, you make me so incredible happy"  
_ - - - -  
_April sat in the ER, she knew what the medicine she held in her hands would do to her.  
Se took it and drove away, out in the forest where no one would find her.  
She knew they would think she moved home and her parents wouldn't care, they had never cared.  
She put it in the needle and pulled it through her skin and she laid back.  
She shut her eyes and ten seconds later, she stopped breathing.


End file.
